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Top Chef — Frozen Food Infomercial Edition
By oceanguy | August 2, 2007
The Top Chef folks broke new ground with the in-your-face Nascaresque product pitching, this time with the Rocco DiSpirito’s Bertolli Mediterranean Style Frozen Dinners Elimination Challenge… whew, need a breath after that one. In a huge insult to all of us Top Chef Fans the producers had our chefs lower themselves to producing mass produced frozen food… for a “celebrity chef.” It didn’t appear many of the cheftestants were particularly impressed with Rocco… neither were the judges really… Actually you have to give the producers credit for designing a challenge which gave one sponsor a virtual hour long infomercial about how to build a quality frozen dinner. The only thing missing was Ron Popiel as a guest judge. Still, despite the blatant commercial, the challenge was pretty well structured… although… not really up to the Top Chef standards we’ve come to expect. In fact the challenge would have been better played at the Next Food Network Star using Sandra Lee as the guest un-cook judge, but alas, our Top Chef producers took the low road and had our chefs produce a meal fit for Sandra Lee… Rocco and Sandra Lee… Yes THAT Rocco, or as Anthony Bourdain put it, “the ‘thatsa speecy, spicy meatball!’ shill-for-hire and ex-reality show personality?” You know, I just don’t see Top Chef as a guide for home cooks… and for them to be doing frozen entrees??? I think it cheapens the whole dining out in a nice restaurant experience. Is that what Rocco is all about? Anyway, at least the Quickfire was free of product placement, and we got to see Rocco dissed.
The Quickfire Challenge was essentially ripped off from a game the cheftestants played off camera the first week which was ripped off from Season 1. You can see the video on the web site of Hung and Clay competing in a blind taste test. During the Quickfire, they did the same thing but were not blindfolded and it was called a Culinary Bee. They were told they had 5 seconds to answer questions, even though there were no questions. Instead, they took turns identifying by sight or taste different ingredients. The highlight of the challenge was seeing Hung disdainfully identify his ingredient as Anise Seed… such a pedestrian task, he seemed to say, was far below him… that is until Padma asked him “Are you sure you don’t want to taste it?” He realized then it was celery seed… ooops too late, they had to take the first answer… and Hung… everyone else’s favorite to win, was knocked out by his own arrogance… beautiful irony.
Anyway, Casey won the challenge and with it her second immunity, and it was off to draw knives to pair up in teams of two to make the frozen Mediterranean Style dinners ala Bertolli. The rules were to prepare a demo sample and 15 frozen bag meals to demo and sell the next day at The Fresh Market. Yes… selling frozen entrees at The Fresh Market. [not so beautiful irony]
Right off the bat, you knew the Joey-Hung [is he really?] team was in trouble. Likewise with Howie and SahRah, Howie’s active aggressiveness matched with SahRah’s passive-Aggressive manner meant that both of them were in trouble from the start.
So, they got their instructions and got some sample Bertolli dinners to tear into to see how to create the magic of the Sandra Lee dinner. A few of them quickly caught on to the trick… the ingredients were individually frozen and then placed in the bags… still most decided to stick to their home cooking tricks and ignore the proven Bertolli formula for mass producing a bagged frozen entree. Copying the Bertolli technique worked for Tre and CJ, giving them the win. Meanwhile the two troubled teams were sunk with terrible re-heated dishes. The dishes were probably OK before they were frozen, but they didn’t master the Bertolli infomercial gimmick. I don’t mean to be too critical, because infomercial or not, and although there wasn’t a lot of culinary talent on display, there was still some drama in the show, and not only among the cheftestants.
The Tre-CJ team’s frozen dinner brought a bit of argument to the judges table between Rocco and Tom… two Italians… arguing over whether the Black truffle was Mediterranean or not… Rocco got his way. Tre’s idea of using the truffle butter wound up being pure genius… and the only real quality culinary touch that we expect from ALL of the cast. The team didn’t sell out of the 15 meals they prepared, but still it was judged as the best frozen entree. Casey and Dale did sell out and appeared to be the fan favorite, but Casey probably had a lot to do with that. At least from the editing, it looked like more than one customer was flirting with her… with only 15 meals to sell it didn’t take many flirts to affect the outcome.
The bottom two teams barely sold a thing. Joey, the Italian and Hung, the asshole didn’t sell a single dinner… As Padma Quipped, “They couldn’t sell free food.” No one even took a chance speculating on its e-bay value. At least Howie and SahRah sold 3 of their dinners.
It was funny watching the two loser teams through the whole process, especially at The Fresh Market. While they were shopping, I was fascinated by their process of choosing which pasta to use. First they show Howie and SahRah arguing… Rigatoni or Tri-colored Fusilli… Howie hit the nail on the head calling the fusilli “the cheesiest pasta you see on every buffet table in every schlock house in the country,”… but SahRah thought it would be pretty, and different… Howie acquiesced. The other pair had a similar discussion with Hung arguing for Penne Pasta and Joey the [cheesy?] Italian going for the pretty… and interesting… multi-colored Fusilli, it confirmed my suspicion that he would be the one sent packing. But choice of pasta aside… if they’d only frozen it separately both dishes would likely have worked… the teamwork just sucked and they deserved the bottom spots at the Judges’ Table.
Lucky for SahRah, Joey just showed himself to be an utter dolt during the challenge… as Foghorn might say, “That boy, I say, that boy is about as sharp as a Bowlin’ Ball.” Despite being told more than a couple of times by Hung that they were going to freeze all their ingredients separately, Joey charged, undaunted, wielding his sauce laden spoon, and attacking each serving of pasta with tomato sauce. As Hung explained, the pasta soaked up the moisture from the sauce and the pasta was just mush. And Joey, sounding more like Stallone than a real Top Chef, explained that if you want to get a point across to him you have to be aggressive. Man, that’s a great quality for an executive chef! There was no way Joey was staying, no matter how much talent he has or had shown. It was early in the show I picked Joey as the one to be leaving as he was delivering his Line of the Night.
While explaining to us that the competition was heating up and that no holds would be barred Joey explained how he was prepared, “If that means throwing somebody over the bus, it’s gonna start happening.” Then he added “throwing over the balcony.” Right then I thought, “Joey’s gone…” he’s going to get thrown under… I mean over…the bus… and Hung did it to him… and rightly so, Joey knew it. The only surprise was the tearful exit interview Joey endured. His public exit was graceful and uncharacteristically mature, but he boo-hooed into the camera as he said good-bye, it was tough to watch, especially knowing that the lousy Frozen food challenge was his downfall. He had shown glimpses of talent, but not enough to keep him around in a challenge he should have won… maybe would have won if they didn’t have to freeze the freaking left-overs. Now he’ll have to use his own money to send his Mom and sister to Italy.
So… Bertolli had a good night… no, a GREAT night… pitching their frozen dinners, and Top Chef cheapened their image by turning our chefs into food plant assembly line workers. I hope that’s the end of fast food prep from these talented chefs, though I dread the next innovation in product placement. Thankfully, chef Boyardee isn’t a sponsor.
Tre and Brian are still my favorites to win. Each has the complete package, the temperament, imagination and the skills to win… AND they seem to know the “game.” Howie, CJ and Dale are on the second tier, but Howie keeps tempting fate. He’s won a couple of challenges, but he’s been in the bottom for all but one of the others… that’s not my idea of a winner. Casey might be the dark horse, but she’s had a couple of serious lapses of judgment that makes me think she can’t play the game as well as some others.. I doubt she can win, but it wouldn’t surprise me depending on how the challenges fall.. and who gets the immunity. About Hung, I’m not sure.
Hung appears to have the talent and knowledge, as well as the respect of the cast, to win. But his arrogance has been getting him in trouble, that and he’s so damned immature. He started off great, but, in his eyes, has been receiving more criticism than is fair. He doesn’t take that criticism well. I get the feeling that he wouldn’t admit to learning anything on the show… he just feels like he isn’t being given the right opportunity to teach everyone else. I can’t see him winning, and he isn’t even the most entertaining cast member… that would be Howie.
SahRah will be the next one to pack up… unless they have to make cheese or someone else really screws the pooch. She appears to have the least talent among those left. Again, last night she was lucky Joey was such a bonehead, and she was lucky to be paired with Howie, Hung would have tossed her “over the bus.” Sara will likely follow her, she’s a middle-of-the-packer and will need to take some sort of risk to shine… she won’t pull it off. Howie could easily blow my prediction by having another disaster and save one of the Saras. Whatever happens, we are getting down to a much more manageable crowd and it’s starting to get much more fun to watch. I just hope they don’t ruin the show with another challenge that takes them away from showing their imagination and kitchen skills. Product placement, as ugly and distracting as it is, is tons better than the Sandra Lee, chef in a bag idea. I trust they’ll bring back the real chefs showing us real talent with the next episode…
And I can’t wait to see what next week’s Guilty Pleasures will bring us.
Other Blog opinions:
Just a little LATE: Anthony Bourdain writing on Tom Colicchio’s Blog
Ted Allen
Gail Simmons
Blogging Top Chef
Eggbeater
From Inside the Box
Glowy Box
TV Cocktail
Reality Cooking
Season 1 Winner Harold Dieterle
Random Reality Thoughts
The TV Zone
Entertainment Weekly
Top Chef Miami Herald Blog
Pho’s Akron Pages
Serious Eats
Televisionary
The Stew
Topics: Top Chef |
August 3rd, 2007 at 2:06 pm
I think you’re too hung up on the product placement business. Let’s face it, the entire show is just an excuse for the commercials. This is about making money, not advancing human civilization through great art.
It was great to see Hung get burned in the quick-fire, but I was impressed with him at the end. He really did seem reluctant to blame Joey even though he would have been completely justified in doing so (’Hell yeah I f**king told him to freeze the stuff separately. Dumbass didn’t listen!’) I think he was afraid of getting punched.
I could have seen Sara going. She hasn’t shown anything, and Joey’s a lot more interesting to watch. I don’t know whether to feel sorry for him or not with all that blubbering worse than the girls did. He was certainly emotionally invested in the show!
August 3rd, 2007 at 2:48 pm
I expect the product placement, I just don’t like the NASCARization of it… Padma saying, with a straight face, “The Kingsford Charcoal Elimination Challenge” Yes it’s expected, tolerated even as long as they don’t go over the top. TC has gone over the top a few times and this Bertolli Infomercial was the over-the-topest.
How’s that for invented words?
December 15th, 2007 at 9:53 pm
wow. you people all have WAY too much time on your hands